Focus or not to Focus

Finally I got Blogger to act right. I had been having major problems.

So I haven't made a post with bullets in a minute. I guess today is the day for my randomness to kick in.

• It's amazing how we get off track with our food and become addicted. I read someone's post (don't remember who) about the brain of an addict and how our brains look the same whether we are addicted to drugs or food. It was an eye opener to say the least. I don't remember all the details, but it really gave a different perspective to how we "foodies" are so similar to folk who abuse harmful drugs.

• I am so off with my eating. If it was confession Wednesday, I would tell you that I ate about a half cup of Ben & Jerry's Peanut Butter Cup and 4 Cashew Sandies. Not good. Today I had a McDonald's hash brown and 1 of 2 sausage burritos. I just couldn't eat the other one. I'm not stuffed, but I am full.I actually stopped before my shoulder started hurting, meaning I stopped before I got stuffed and hurt myself. Trying to get better with that. My mind sometimes reverts back to when I was a kid and we were told that we had it better than the children in Ethiopia so we needed to eat all of our food. I never have understood how my eating all my food would help the starving children in Ethiopia, but oh well.

• Which brings me to this, I've heard people say that (paraphrasing) in order to lose weight and keep it off you have to not focus on food. Ok, because I'm have creative AND logical mind, how are you supposed to do that. I ask that because with the band in order to accomplish our goal and to lose weight we have to be meticulous about food. You have plan what you are going to eat and how much. Measure and weigh, portion control. You can't eat high fat food, fast food, fried food, et cetera, et cetera. My question is how do you NOT focus on food when you have to plan everything you put in your pie hole....ummmm pie, opps got off track for a second there. Where was I....oh, I find that I am constantly thinking about food. What I'm going to eat, how to prepare it, when I'm going to eat and how much of it I can or cannot eat. It can be a bit much at times. Being & getting fat was easy, losing it is hard as nails.

• My son is going to do a semester at the community college here in the city and then transfer back to TSU. I'm over my disappointment and know that he will succeed. I've learned that the only failure is not trying.

• I am so stoked about Chicago and the B.O.O.B.s trip!! I will confess that I'm a little nervous. I have been thinking about what to wear and checking the B.O.O.B.s blog to see if an agenda has been posted so I can plan around that. I tend to be a little OCD with trip planning. And seeing as since I haven't been on a real vaca in some time. The planning will go into overdrive.

• I am also (another confession) nervous about meeting all you wonderfully successful and gorgeous ladies. I feel like it's my first year in high school and thinking, will anyone talk to me. Will I be sitting by myself and just looking around. I have some wonderful roommates and know I will have fun with them, but I don't want to isolate myself and monopolize all their time. Funny thing is that folk who know me would say "Are you kidding me! Pam, you are the most outgoing chick we know!" I'm a friendly person and sometimes (no most times) go out of my way to make friends and be friendly. Ohhh well.

• Just random....why am I sitting here on Keelie's page listening to her music. Keelie is so motivating and has been so successful. She has such a great outlook. The first song that starts playing is "The Climb" by Miley Cyrus. Although I'm not a big fan, I love that song. It just puts you in the mood to know that you got to keep going. You've got to keep climbing towards your goal, whatever that may be. You can't stop and cry over the mountain that's in your way. Get up and wipe those tears, push, pull, climb your way up, past or around it.

Lastly I want to leave you with this:


Justawallflower said...

What a beautiful story! Thank you so much for sharing it with us!

Don't you worry about a thing when it comes to Chicago. I happen to personally know two of your roommates, and they are awesome! lol! I, on the other hand, don't even want to think about how nervous I will be. Social anxiety and trying to chill with 60 strangers? Oh good lord, help me!

Stephanie said...

Ok roomie, here's the deal. You are going to do just fine in Chicago. You're rooming with 3 fabulous ladies and we will hve a great time. Trust will be like "The Hangover" but without the tigers in the bathroom and getting married to a stripper.

We don't yet have a "schedule" planed per se, but I will email you personally with an idea of what we did last year. Friday night was dressy casual and everyone wore what you would wear going out on a Friday, Saturday night we do a nice dinner out so we all wore something dressy. During the day, it was jeans and casual attire. There is no need to try and impress people, because this is the place we can all just be outselves and have fun!!

I know that once we get an idea of things that people want to do we will have little outings for people who want to do different things. Some may want to shop (everything from Coach and Tiffanys to Marshalls and TJ Maxx), some may want to go to a musuem, Chinatown or Greektown, there was mention of hitting the Second City Improv Theater Late friday night for some laughs.

The entire trip is what you make of it. As a planner last year I was stressed, but this year I am just going to chill and enjoy. There is no rule that you have to become best buddies with everyone there, but you will leave chicago with some dear friends you will keep for life!!!

We are going to have a blast. Brandi, Dawnya, you and I go together like PB&J. Having roommies will be like college all over again, but without a psyco bitch roommmate like I had my freshman year!!!

Pamela E. Williams said...

Ooooohhhh Ladies!!! You guys are so wonderful!!! I am just grinning up a storm right now. You both are truly wonderful! I know I will have MARVELOUS time! I am so geeked right now!!

Theresa aka Tessie Rose said...

Don't worry about a thing. I was nervous last year and it was sooo wonderful, everyone far exceded my exectations and I loved everyone of the ladies!!!! As for that story...OMG, no mascara left! Have a great weekend. Now,about the food, how is your fill level, I don't think about food all the time with a proper fill, because I'm not hungry all the time. Talk to your Doctor and hang in there!

Pamela E. Williams said...

Thank you Theresa!! I think I will follow your advice and check on a fill.

tagyourit said...

great post. I hope you have fun at boobs