I know it's been a while. I have been mad busy. No excuses for being a slack blogger, but hey it's all I got.

Before I get into all that has been going on I must first say a warm thank you to TessieRose. She gave me a holler on Facebook (it's easier to post little blips than to post a thought provoking blog and it takes less time too)to see if I was alright. I am so thankful for folk like Tessie thinking of me. I told her in a message that I was just thinking that no one would probably notice if I didn't blog. I guess I was wrong. I think we underestimate the value we have sometimes. I wasn't being down on myself it's just that I'm not superstar in the blog sphere like others. I will say that I don't underestimate the need to be here in this forum because as before I realize how much it helps to blog and keep a virtual diary of the successes as well as the slip ups. I will try not to stay away to long again. Thank you again TessieRose for thinking of me.

Ok it wouldn't be true to form or me unless I did this in scattered bullet points, so here goes.

•I will be starting classes Jan 13th. Yay me!!

•I have decided that after finishing up my bachelor degree, I am going to take some courses to become a Life Coach. This is something that I have been doing since I was 14, but never knew there was a name for it. I will then consider whether going for my Master's in Counseling will be best or not.

•My SUN is home!! YAY!!! He had a rough time this past semester and didn't do so hot in the grade department. I think he underestimated just how much time Marching Band and studying would pull on him. He told me (after he got home for Christmas break) that he almost went to the emergency room for exhaustion right before Thanksgiving. My heart started racing. What a thing to tell me AFTER THE FACT. I asked him why he didn't call me and he said with all the other things I was worrying about that he didn't want to add HIS health to it all. He had only slept 2 hours in a 78 hour span of time. Needless to say, I am asking him to set some priorities. Band isn't one of them in my opinion.

•I GOT MY HOUSE BACKKKKKKK!!!!! My baby sister and her 2.5 children finally got a place of their own. I love my family dearly, but my house is small so having two little ones underfoot all the time can wear on you. I had no privacy OR patience on many occasions. I was not only taking my niece & nephew to daycare, but taking my sister(who is pregnant again) to school and then I would get to work (late). I'm glad we don't clock in, but believe me my boss and the former Executive Director always made it a point to let me know I was late and that they didn't like it. Nevertheless, my sister and her children are happy and I am happy right now.

•Got a new person in the office who is an ANGEL!! I have been trying to train her as best I could with limited resources because the former Executive Director who left the position conveniently left no word on how to do her job. It has been stressful for me and the new person because she wants to do a good job. She wants to raise the morale around here and I for one am happy about that. We got together and threw a Christmas party for the division and everyone had a blast! SN: the former ED is still on contract and will be coming back in January to supposedly train the new person. I don't hold high hopes for her (new person) learning ANY-THING!!

•On the weight loss front, I have been eating like crap. I put on about 3 pounds but am confident I will loose it and more after the holidays. I'm not stressing over it because everyday someone brings in treats. It's hard as heck to resist, so I haven't.....*shrugs*. I bought the "400 Calorie Fix" by Liz Vaccariello cause it looked really good and so far so good. I just got it yesterday so I will let you know if it helps. I did copy Lap Band Gal and arranged a drawer with healthy stuff. I am still adding stuff, but here is a picture of it.

Ok that's enough of my rambling. I hope and pray that you all have a wonderfully blessed and memorable holiday season. May Christmas be filled with love, laughter and family and may the New Year bring new adventures and happiness your way.



The above is who my doctor acts like. I went in today for my appointment and was debating on a fill. I think I needed one, but at the same time really didn't want one. I will get to that in a minute. Dr. Woodman, has absolutely no bedside manner whatsoever. Not that I can't take anything this man can dish out, but he just trips me out really. Today my scale still read 237#. I was hoping to see Dory, his nurse but no cigar. I knew his scale would read differently. As in more than what mine says, differently. And boy did it ever. His scale read 241. That means I am 4 lbs down from the last visit in which I weighed 245 lbs. I told him what my scale says and not to disagree with his scale, but to say that I have some adjustments to make, he told me "it doesn't matter what your scale says, mine is the only one that matters." Wow, really? The doctor then tells me that none the scales out on the market are reliable for people over 200 lbs and I'm wasting my time and money. He then asks me what I have been doing in the last month and I told him truthfully that my exercising has been off because I had the flu and I have been eating more than a saucer full of food on occasion. You would think that he would say something like "well since you know what you are doing wrong then I'm sure you know how to fix it." Hey I could take that, but he tells me...."well I think you need to schedule a surgery to have the lap band removed because obviously you don't want to comply with the rules to lose the weight." He goes on to tell me that I still have 100 lbs to lose and whatnot and I just sit there and zone out. I tell him I don't think I want a fill and he tells me that if someone doesn't follow the rules that a fill won't help them. I again tell him I don't think I want one and he says well I think a little adjustment might help. Contradictory much....I hear him, but not really. I didn't fall into his negative trap though because all of a sudden he pays me a back end compliment and tells me, I have had some success in that I have lost 36 lbs (according to his scales - 41 lbs according to my own). He then gives me a fill and gives me a thumbs up after giving me a cup of water. On another note I knew he as an

when I signed up with him. So it's all relative. And for the record my goal weight is 160 lbs so I only have 77 lbs to lose or 81 by his scale.

I owned up to the fact that I have been off with my food intake. Fat grams (because he doesn't believe in counting calories) I believe I am good on, so I feel I need to kick up my exercise regimen and increase the water. Yesterday my nephew celebrated his 8th birthday and I went over to my sister's house with some of my other fam and had cake and a little Hawaiian Punch. I would normally not have had any, but my nephew really wanted me to have cake. He doesn't understand about dieting and losing weight so you know I couldn't explain the lap band to him. He kept saying "auntie are you gonna eat some cake with us?" How could I say no. This is the nephew that has Cerebral Palsy and uses a walker. My sister tells me all the time how he asks for me. So I couldn't let him down. Here are a couple of pics of him. He is such a sweetheart.

I'm a little bit afraid of Thanksgiving, but hey it is a holiday. That's the reason I didn't want a fill because truthfully I want to enjoy the meal. I know it's wrong, but shoot, it's Thanksgiving after all. Dr. Woodman gave me a fill and I think it was .5 ccs because he doesn't tell his patients how much he fills. I did ask Dory because I saw her afterward. I am doing a bladder study for her and getting paid $250 to do it, so she looked in the computer for me and said he hadn't put it in there yet. Doesn't matter right now because I will find out later. I did get paid $50 for the 1st study visit today and I have 4 more visits in which I will get paid $50 more each time.

I won't see the doctor again until Jan. 6th and I plan to be at least 10 lbs down. When I saw Dory I asked again about the 1-2 lbs a week and she said that's standard and good pace to lose weight. I won't go into the spill Dr. Woodman gave me about successful lap banders and how much they lose. Sometimes I wonder if this guy has all his screws tightened.

Anyway, Happy Monday!!!

frickanfrackanfrickfrackan!!!!!! Can someone help me find an old post????

I need a bit of help y'all!! PLEASE!!

I'm looking for a post someone made a little while ago. In the post there was a picture of their desk drawer at work with good HEALTHY stuff in there. I don't know who posted it or exactly when but I know it couldn't have been over 3 months ago.

Can anybody help me???? Please. I am a certified copy cat, but long story short....I have a new storage cabinet right by my desk and I want to fill one of the drawers with healthy stuff to snack on in case I forget lunch or stuff like that. I found a list online and I have some thoughts, but just wanted to look at that post again. HELP!!!!

Please and thank you!!

UPDATE: Jen & Tessierose are my certified HEROINES!! They led me right to Lap Band Gal's post I'm doing my happy Snoopy dance right!!!!


I'm down to the 230s!!! Whoo hooo!! I now weigh 238. Yay me!! I'm sick with the flu & I'm sending this from my phone. Take care!!

It's Working - NSVs

Hey all,

Just wanted to make a quick post to encourage some folk. For those out there that are feeling down and thinking the band may not be doing its job. Or for the ones that have been eating crappy and need a fill and need to climb back on the horse again. Or just for the ones out there who are just feeling down or ANXIOUS about anything. I want to let you know that you inspire me. Regardless to whether you are an old pro at this band thing, a novice at this band thing, haven't got this band thing yet or ain't gonna get this band thing....YOU KEEP ME GOING!! You keep me looking forward to what I will see the next day and the days to come in YOU and in MYSELF. Mary, Joey, Amy W., Draz, Mrs. Fatass, Ronke, Band Groupie, Tessie, Stephanie, J. Reid, ok I'm about to get myself in trouble naming names, but if I follow you, I'm speaking directly to you.

Know that I love you dearly in this virtual world and in the existing world. You have kept me going and going and going (even though I have been a crappy blogger in only reading and not commenting - ugggh work). I look forward to reading your journeys and hearing your comments on mine.

Here are are some NSVs for ya.
1.) I need to put another hole in my belt because it's a little loose.

2.) My oldest sister hadn't seen me in about 2 months and saw me and said "Wow, you are getting smaller." She also told my next to the youngest sister, that "Pam looks good." Yay!! It's the little things y'all.

I got a waistline y'all!!
My face is slimming.

Compared to this pic below taken in May:

Or this one in July:

My first 5K!!

I did it!! I'm so proud of myself. On this past Saturday, I walked in the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure. It was cold as....let's just say it was COLD!!! 40 degrees. I had on 3 shirts and a jacket. I forgot my gloves and it took a long while to warm up. I was up at 5:45 a.m. getting ready. Now this was my first walk so I didn't know what to do or what to expect. I was alone and my friends were coming later. I walked up to the Survivor's tent to go in and this older lady told me I couldn't because I didn't have a survivor shirt on. She told me I needed to have proof of registration. I told her that they didn't tell me that in the email. And she told me "well you can't come in." She wasn't nice OR helpful at all. I was about to cry y'all. I really wanted to, then this so sweet young lady from Zeta Tau Alpha Fraternity (the national sponsors of the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure survivor program and who provided and served breakfast) stepped up and told me what all I needed to do. All I had to do was go over to the registration area and give my name and they would cross it off the list and give me my t-shirt. That other lady could have told me that. So I walked on over and got it, put it on and trotted right back over to the tent. I missed the survivor picture, but I didn't care because I felt like I was now being allowed to enter into this elite club (oxymoron much!)

To much to tell here, but hopefully you will enjoy the pictures. I've attached them on another page. Let me just say that I look like a potato cause I have on so many clothes, but I'm down 36lbs. and am weighing 242lbs. now. I'm so happy and the scale has been kind. Jiminy is doing his job, Whooo HOOOOO!!!


I have been working steadily for about two weeks now. Work just somehow started piling up. Amazing because it isn't my work, but I did agree to help. That's why I haven't been posting much. I've been logging onto Facebook, but for short spurts at a time. Nothing where I could sit and put up a blog about what is going on. So lets start with my faithful bullet points. Honestly that's the only way I can stay on track and make a little bit of sense.

Weight loss - I had a fill today. I saw the nurse, Dori, today and I love, Love, LOVE her. I asked Dori, how much she put in my band and she sat and talked with me and told me I have 3.5ccs in it (today she put in 1cc). I didn't ask the doctor the last time I was there because he wouldn't tell anyway according to others I know who go to him. She told me that Dr. Woodman doesn't believe in telling his patients how much he puts in because he doesn't want them comparing, but that she didn't see any reason why I shouldn't know. I think I am very close to my sweet spot by the way. I thanked Dori and told her that I am very hands-on when it comes to my health care plus I do a blog and I wanted to put that in. We also talked about me being a BC survivor and told me about her cousin who just underwent a bilateral mastectomy and is about to go through chemo. I gave her info and she asked about my doctors. It seems her cousin and I have the same general surgeon. It was a good visit. Anyway, I am 6.6lbs down from the last visit. Not stellar, but hey I will take it. Which makes me a total of 33lbs. down. I weigh 245lbs. I haven't seen that number in quite some time. I must say I am quite pleased with myself. I love the way I feel and look. I will say though that I could have done better and will definitely be putting in 100%. I kinda slacked the week of my birthday and the week after and didn't exercise the way I should. I know that it will only get better. I did the 4 mile Superwalk yesterday with Leslie(Walk Away the Pounds DVD). It kicked my butt, but you know what kicked my butt even more.....the fact that I did 3 reps of squats after that along with back kicks (I don't know the technical name for it, but it's where you face the wall and kick your leg back; good for the butt). My thighs are so sore right now. Every time I go to sit down I feel it. You all just don't know how pleased I am because before the surgery, exercise was walking to my office building and back.

Lifting Weights - so I talked with my physical therapist and she said I can lift no more than 10lbs. because of they lymphedema. She suggested I used firming bands, which I already do with the WATP DVD and cable cords. She also said I could do push ups. I don't want to have bat wings after this weight loss, plus I know building muscle will help with the weight loss.

Breast Reconstruction - I saw my plastic surgeon today and he put some more fluid in my tissue expander. I will not be getting my permanent implants until next year. It was a bummer at first but when he explained why, I got it. Because I am loosing weight if I get the implants now they are going to be sagging and lopsided because of the fat loss. He would rather I waited until I was either at goal or very close to goal to have the surgery as to get the best look. Ok, so I'll wait. I'm the type of person who sets a schedule and lives by it. I don't like going off plan, but I do understand his reasonings and will comply. So this allows me look at my weight loss and plan around that. I won't bore you with the details, but if I can loose 10lbs a month, I will be down the remaining 70lbs. by May. I will be done with Spring classes and can afford to lay back for a minute until June Summer session starts up. That's my plan and I'm sticking with it. I did stop by A Fitting Place which is a bra place her in Memphis and got a great compression vest/bra. It will reduce the swelling so that my skin & tissue will be soft for surgery, but the greatest part about that besides it being free because my insurance pays 100%, is that I no longer have side boobs ;-). I am so happy to look and feel somewhat normal.

I won't make this to long a post, but know that I missed you guys. I logged in a couple of times, but because I couldn't dedicate the time I wanted to reading and commenting on the blogs, I just didn't at all. It was like something was missing from my life when I didn't connect with you all. I will have a computer at home in December when I get my longevity check. Now, I can get finish with this remaining crap on my desk.

Happy Monday!!

Birthday Bliss

Happy Tuesday all!!

I am so worn out but happy as a lark. My birthday was Sunday and I took off Monday to go to various doctor's appointments, including getting a fill, but ended up canceling because I got the surprise of my life Sunday when my son came home for my birthday.

Quick story: I got up Sunday and gave thanks for not only living to see another year, but for also being cancer free for a year. So I celebrated two birthdays. I fixed myself a protein smoothie and excepted hugs from my niece and nephew for my birthday. My youngest sister was all the while pulling on their little jackets. I asked if she was taking them outside to play since it was nice out, although I thought is was kinda early. She just said no and kept doing what she was doing. My mom came out of her bedroom and had her keys in her hand. I thought she was going out to buy a Sunday paper as she does every Sunday. I shrugged and went back to my bedroom to watch the weekend edition of the morning news. Got a call from one of my BFFs singing happy birthday and we talked for about an hour. Got a text from my oldest sister and nephew wishing me a happy birthday so I called them. I soon noticed the house was quiet and thought my youngest sister most have went with my mom. I just assumed they probably went over to another one of my sister's house (there are 5 of us + 1 brother) to finish the supposed surprise party details. Soon I began to wonder where they were, so I texted my sister, but she never replied. I kept talking on the phone. About an hour later they walked in the house and into my bedroom bearing gifts and saying happy birthday. My sister then as she is walking out of my bedroom said oh we have one more gift for you. She exits and in walks my son!! I just started screaming and crying. You see I nor he thought he would be able to get home because he couldn't find a ride. I was even a littled ticked at a couple of his friends for not making room for him (another story). He decided late Saturday night to catch the Greyhound home to surprise me. I was definitely surprised. I just hugged, kissed and rocked him. It was like he had been gone years. I know it has only been two months, but because we are so close I miss him greatly everyday. Plus he has never missed one of my birthdays since he has been born. We laughed, talked and ate (far to much) as I welcomed another year. I put him back on the bus last night and he got back in Nashville around midnight. My year is complete.

I'm sleepy as heck because I stayed up awaiting his call to make sure he got into his dorm safely. There have been a series of robberies at his school and one boy got held up at gun point right on my son's dorm room floor. My son says it has to be somebody that lives there but they haven't been caught yet. My son stays aware of his surroundings, but I couldn't sleep until I knew he was safe in his room. He is and I can breathe.

WL note: I lost those 2lbs I gained. I'm down to 247 which is one pound down from where I was. I'm happy about that although I wonder did I undo all of that with my eating on Sunday. I don't think so because my sister cooked some great low cal/low fat stuff. My portion sizes I know were off though and I was able to eat it all which is why I think I will get that fill on the initial date scheduled which is October 25th. Hopefully I will be more than 8lbs down.

A ...GAIN!!

So I knew it would happen so I didn't freak out when I saw that my devil of a scale was saying that I was 2lbs. up. Ugggh!! So that busts up my 240s and put me back at 250 even. That's ok cause I know what I need to do. I missed two days of exercising and kinda ate a little more than I should. I'm cool. I know this is part of the journey. My birthday is on Sunday so my family has planned a surprise for me. They are trying their best to include my new eating habits in the celebration. They ask could I eat pound cake. I told them yes. So instead of the big thick sweet frosted cake I am having pound cake with lite whipped cream and strawberries (my favorite). They know I don't like big frosted cakes anyway.

SN: I'm wondering should I purchase the Weight Watchers scale that I saw in the magazine. I read on another blog that someone got it. I wonder if it is worth the hype. Anybody got one and want to give a quick review? I just hate that my scale has a 2lb. difference from my doctor.

I think I will have to up my exercise because I have been getting in about 225 minutes (45 mins. 5 days a week) of exercise a week. I do the Leslie Sansone video and brisk walk 3 miles with a little jogging in between. I think I will have to add a day. I do however see the difference in my body. I now have a waistline and as my baby sister terms it a "booty", LOL!! I had to check myself out from the back. Shocker I tell ya!! Today I have on this suit jacket that I bought years ago and it is soooo big on me. I look like a kid playing in my momma's closet in this thing. I have to get a new suit jacket. I'm thinking of the cute ones that hit at the waist. This one is long and outdated style wise, but hey when you are limited on funds, something has to suffer.

Anyway, just wanted to check in with ya. I will come back with my ghost story. Stay tuned.

40's BABY!! and I got a question

Ok so this is the WL post as opposed to the one on Thursday. ☺ boy would I love to be 80lbs down. But this post is to say that I am now in the 240s. YAY!!! I got on the scale this morning and I officially weigh 246lbs. WHOO-HOOO!! Now on my doctor's scale it would read 248 (because they just have to be difficult & be 2lbs more), but hey I'm in the 240's!! I am so happy.

I have been thinking a lot about restriction. When I got my first fill, my doctor told me if I didn't feel anything to come back in a week and get another one. I have been trying to track my satiety and this is what I get:

•When I drink a protein drink I get hungry 2 hours out. I mean stomach growling like a rabid wolf. I realize because its a liquid its going to go straight through. I'm ok with that because I'm trying to make sure I get my protein in.

•When I eat real food ex. 1 cup of oatmeal with truvia and golden raisins, I can finish only 3/4s of it and I am full for about 3 1/2 hours. I read a post on that the norm is 4 hours.

Which brings me to this question. Should I go get a fill? Yesterday for dinner I had a 1/2 cup of Progresso soup with some crackers and a salad (no meat). The salad was about a 1 cup & 1/2. I was full, but borderline stuffed. Not stuffed though. I could eat more if I let myself, but I don't want to stretch my band. Sometimes I wonder if this is to much (this refering to the soup & salad).

I have to say I'm scared of restriction. Does that make sense? I have heard stories about people not being able to swallow or eat because of to much fluid in the band. Also I feel silly typing this, but in a way I wonder will I be able to get all my nutrients in if I can't eat much. I am diligent with my vitamins and protein. I even found Biotin at Wal-Mart in 5000 mcg - 1 tab. Now I dont' have to take 5 tabs a day in 1000 mcg. I DO NOT want to loose any more hair. Shoot I just started getting this to grow back.

Help y'all!!

80s BABY!!!!

That's 80 friends. I will soon get to the 80lbs. down, but give me a minute.

Hello to all my new and seasoned friends that seem to think I have something interesting to say. I ♥ you all. Thank you for keeping up with these crazy ramblings. I hope that you will let me know if I'm not following you so that I can do that ASAP. It's almost Friday and that means "IT's THE WEEEEEEEEEEEEEKEEEEEEENNNNNND BAAAAAAAAAABY!!!"

Hugging my BOOBS & A Song for You

I have been reading posts for the last day or so about the return of people from the BOOBS event. It seems that some have met with a sort of postpartum/reflection. The trip no doubt was fun, but also brought out some hidden things that the ones affected were not prepared to deal with. For that I have a big ole HUG and say just breathe. I'm playing DJ today so this is for you.

Lady Lap Band is giving away something cool

Hey all,

Just a short post to let you know that Lady Lap Band is giving a way this

Dang I would love to win this. Good luck all.


Weight Loss, Jealousy & Going back to school

Morning all *yawn*,

No I haven't awakened yet. I worked out and my muscles are sore. I did the full 3 mile workout with Leslie Sansone. For those of you who don't know her (I'm sure most of you do), she has a series of videos aptly titled "Walk Away the Pounds. She is wonderful. She gives you a full workout that it is not strenuous on your limbs, but gives you a good heart and deep muscle work out. I own this one:

It comes with a stretchy band for that part of the workout when the muscles are really engaged. Well I had a break through yesterday when I did the first session all the way through. That's 3 miles NON-STOP!! That's a feat for me as I had only gotten up to 2 miles and would stop. Before that I would do 1 mile probably twice a day. I am so proud of myself. I exercised for 45 minutes without taking a break. Even in Zumba I would have to take a breather. I'm happy to say I'm down 2lbs. since my last doctor visit and my goal is to lose another 8 to 10 before my next trip to Nashville to go to TSU's homecoming on November 6th. I can't wait to see my son's face when he sees the weight loss.

Next I must confess, I haven't been able to read the BOOBs updates because of overwhelming jealousy. Yes I admit it. I see it and it pains me to see that I missed all of that. I'm so happy you guys had fun, but I'm sad :-(. I saw someone post that they need a date for the next one because they don't plan on missing it. I agree. I refuse to miss the next BOOBs event. I know the powers that be that did all the planning need a long respite, and by all means do that, but when you get a breather, I need to know some plan details ;-). I will eventually catch up on the blogs, but until then know that I'm here and well.

The thing that has been keeping me most busy is that I made a big decision. I don't know if anyone remembers the job that I applied for that was formerly occupied by my ED (Executive Director) who left for Hawaii. Well they didn't even consider me for the job. It's ok because after much thought, counsel and meditation, I realized I wouldn't be happy in that job anyway. The person who left the job was part of the interviewing committee and somehow I knew that I had no chance. It wasn't negative thinking that x'ed me out it was realistic thinking. They wanted someone in the job that fit in the looks department. I fit neither of their criteria, although my job skills were impeccable. So I made the decision to go back to school and finish up my bachelor's degree. I plan to get it in Counseling/Social Work. I have many gifts and talents and this degree just hinges on one of them. I will soon after get my master's. I am looking forward to doing something for myself after all these years. I start in the Spring of '11 and plan to do an accelerated program. Since I work at a university, I can go free.

Hope you all have a wonderful day!!

B.O.O.B.s Questionaire

Here is the Gillyified version of Drazil’s BYOC.

1) You’re trapped on a desert island and you can bring only 3 of your favourite foods along. What do you bring?


2) If you could meet any 3 people, living or dead, who would they be and why?

•Dr. Martin Luther King, I would like to know what he thinks of America today.
•President Obama, what his plan is to fix this country and how we can get the Republicans on board with this.
•Matt Lauer, cause I love to watch him on the Today show. I love the way he interviews.

3) What is your stripper name? (take the name of your first pet and the name of the street you grew up on)

JoJo Sax

4) How old were you when you lost your virginity? Alternative question if you don’t want to answer this: What is your LEAST favourite part of your bod since losing weight? Your MOST favourite since losing weight?

I'm going to answer both questions. I was 21 years old when I lost my virginity. My least favorite part of my bod right now is my hanging stomach. I haven't lost much, but I want it to go already. My favorite part right now is my sliming face.

5) Do you believe in ghosts or evil spirits? Would you be willing to spend a night alone in a house that is supposedly haunted?

I definitely believe in ghost, evil and good spirits. I love watching "Ghost Hunters." I have wanted to go on an adventure in a haunted house. I watch different ghost shows sometimes.

6) What is your natural hair colour? If you dye it something completely different from what your momma gave ya, how come?

Dark Brown is my natural color. I haven't dyed it a long while, but in November I hope to get it cut and dye it a dark caramel color.

7) Boxers or briefs? Alternatively…bikinis or granny panties?

For a guy definitely boxers for myself, Bikinis

8) If you could only watch one movie for the rest of your life, what would it be and why? (Trilogies do not count as one movie, cheaterpantses!)

Dang it I was going to say either the Harry Potter movies or Chronicles of Narnia series, but since they don't count....The Wizard of Oz.

9) What is your guilty pleasure (feel free to go straight to the gutter with this one if the spirit moves you!)

LOL, I really don't have one. I have this thing about having an addictive personality so I don't let myself get to engrossed in anything for long. I watch a little reality tv, but won't let myself be a slave to it. There is not one show that I watch religiously. I don't know I might have to check myself on that one to see if I'm fibbing or not.

10) How many pounds gone forever are you celebrating?? :)

25lbs. gone FOREVER!!!!! Celebrate good times, come on!!!!!

1st Fill - Eazy Peazzy & Thank you Grace!!

I got my first fill today. After invisioning pain and the doctor being an a-hole, I got the biggest surprise of the day. Not only did the needle stick not hurt, but the doctor actually was cordial today. There are no words to describe him, but he was cordial today. I'm down 17.4lbs. since the surgery and a total of 25.4lbs. overall. I am very happy with that. I have a 10cc band, but I have no clue how much fluid the doctor put in because he was quick and I was to busy asking questions. I called the office back to ask, but they said that he is not aggressive with fills and put very little in. I am to do liquids today and mushies for the next two days.

When I called back I talked with the office manager Bonnie (whom I just LOVE) and she advised me to not mix my protein with juice. Even low calorie/no fat juices. I had been counting calories and fat grams, but neglected to count carbs, which she says plays a big part in loosing weight. I knew this, but was so focused on what Dr. Woodman said about counting fat grams. Anyway, I will definitely be incorporating this. The juice I use for my smoothie is only 50 cals/0 fat grams per 8 oz. cup, but has 30 carbohydrates (YIKES)!!! So needless to say I am going to find another way to mix my protein. If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know. She told me that a lot of her patients don't lose as much weight as they could because they are on high calorie protein shakes and juices. She also said that when you get the lap band because you have been obese, your body wants to hold on to every gram of carb or fat (which I knew) when trying to loose weight, but also that your body doesn't even metabolize those things the same. If anyone had taken a picture of my face, that look would have been priceless. Bonnie, though did what Dr. Woodman didn't and that was tell me that she is so proud of me. YAY ME!!!

I save the best for last!! I want to thank Grace of Grace's Fat Chance for the parcel I got in the mail on Saturday. OMGGGGG!!!! I am so happy. I even have on a pair of the slacks and a cute top she sent me today. She was so gracious enough to throw in an extra pair of slacks. A few of my sister's were over so when I got the package they were just in awe. They were saying how cute the items were. Everything fits wonderfully and the slacks have a little room for me to run my finger along the waistline. I will be out of these in no time. I have this huge smile on my face. I just love the Sisterhood!! Thank you Grace!!!


I am so hungry right now. I just ate a 4 oz cup of sugar free applesauce and a cheese stick. I don't eat lunch for another hour and a half. UGGGG!!! My stomach is growling like a rabid wolf. Dang it!! I have drank my water and still no let up. Ahhh well, I will be alright.

I went to a support group last night and I can say like all others in this support forum, that there is nothing like my sisters here. The group had about 8 people all in various states of WLS. One lady was considering getting the lap band. There was one person who had the by-pass and another the sleeve, the other 5 of us all had the band in various states of post op. Nothing the nutritionist said was anything I hadn't heard before. She sat there and told us about some studies she had read and basically read a little from the paper. After a while this guy who had the sleeve kind of took over. Actually, I was glad he did because it was boooooooorinnnng. I don't understand what a support group is for if it isn't for support. Maybe I'm just spoiled by what I have with you guys.

Anywho, I go for my first fill and follow up appointment on this Monday (9/20) coming up. One of the ladies who had the band on July 1st told me that our doctor won't have a problem with how much weight I have lost. She said he kind of got in her butt during her follow up because she had lost only 12lbs. Dr. Woodman thinks that you should loose at least 10. I thought well you did that. She said that wasn't anything spectacular in his eyes. Oh well, he will be alright. I still have a week left, so I will see how much I will drop by the 20th. Its not a race and the nutritionist said the same thing that Amy W. said in that everyone is different. I am anxious to see if this first fill will make a difference for me and to see how aggressive he will be with the fill. He is known to be an a-hole, but he doesn't scare me.

I was so excited to see my son this past weekend when he came home with the band to play in the classic. Now I am counting the days until Thanksgiving when he will be home for a few days. I know once that is gone I will be counting the days until Christmas. I miss my son! Here is a picture of him in action at the first game.

With a Cherry on Top!!

I got the "Cherry on Top Award"!!

These are the rules:
1. Answer the question: If you had one chance to go back and change one thing in your life, would you and what would it be?

My answer is similar to Lena's. I wish I would have finished college. I hated that I couldn't go to the college I wanted to out of town and rebelled. My mom didn't want me to leave town (I was still 17) and so I had to go to a local HBCU. I hated it there. I was the fat girl amongst thin light skinned beauties and I hadn't yet figured out that I too was beautiful. Nevertheless I wasted my scholarships and flunked out. I do regret it, and have since tried going back but can't stay committed because of other priorities. Now that my son is in college, I question whether I can now and could be truly committed. I don't want to go back if my heart and passion is not there and thus flunk out again.

2. Pick 6 people and give them this award. You then have to inform the person that they have been selected for the award.

1. Joey
2. Linda
3. Tessie
4. The Banded Lady
5. CindyLew
6. Alycejo

Because I don't conform I had to add another one Ms. Stephanie

There are just so many wonderful ladies that add that spice or that cherry on top and I salute you. To many of y'all to name.

3. You have to thank the person (people) who gave you the award.

Lena you are such a jewel and I consider it an honor to be in the same category as yourself. ♥♥♥

A re-post from a Successful Bander

Hey all! I hope your day has been going fabulous!! I was re-reading Amy W's blog and ran across this entry. I think it says so much about what I have been doing and maybe some of you might see a little of this in yourselves as well. I know I am guilty of it so when I read this entry it just rang true. Amy is such an inspiration to me. Once Upon a Time in the Land of Cheese and Sunkist was the very first blog I started reading and I got hooked. I almost became a stalker of this wonderfully funny charismatic young woman. She hasn't posted in a while, but I know she is still out there, probably still riding high off of her recent birthday. Amy I need a post because I'm starting to have withdraw symptoms.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009
A BIG FAT Comparison
I have been mulling over this post for a few days. I wanted to talk about comparing our weight loss with others. I wonder if my feelings would be different if I were at the low end of the spectrum...but here goes:

My thought on comparing our weight loss with other's weight loss is....


It only feels good when you are "winning". The rest of the time, it makes you feel like a failure. There is no point in it really. It doesn't matter if someone was banded the same time as you or not. We are all built different, shaped different, have different genes, and different jean sizes. Our daily lives are different, our environment is different, our bands are different. And with all those differences, why would you expect to have the same results? For example, Mary, who was banded months after me, has now passed me in weight loss. Do you know why? For all the reasons I listed above AND because she works out more than me and probably doesn't sneak Sunkist into her desk drawer. So I don't beat myself up about it. Would you like someone else to beat you up? No. So why do it to yourself?

We chose the band for various reasons. Hopefully though, we all knew that the band was a slower weight loss, 1-2 pounds on average. But still we, (ME) get cranky when on AVERAGE, that is what we lose. It's like we look at the scale and say "Ah HELL NO BIATCH....ONE POUND!" Like we didnt know that is what is expected. We want Biggest Loser numbers! Well guess what!? We dont work out with the hot Gillian or Bob 8 hours a day on a magical ranch. We live real lives with kids, work, cheetos, parents. And we are succeeding. You know how we feel when one of the contestants are standing up there boohooing about "only" losing 6 pounds in a week? Do you ever think that maybe other, nonbanded folk, look at us the same way when we bitch about only losing 4, 6, or 8 pounds in a month? How quickly we have forgotten that we used to GAIN that in a month.

I started this journey in January at 327 pounds. When I hear people starting off at a weight like 233 (where I am now) or lower, and referring to themselves as FAT COWS, or saying "I can't believe I weigh I get my feelings hurt? No, bc I am smart enough to realize that weight is relative. So while at 233 I feel like I am doing pretty good....for others....that is their highest weight ever. BUT, my point is that when you are feeling like an unpolished turd about your weight, remember that there are those that started even fatter than you! I look at the girl on the Biggest Loser who weighs over 400 pounds and I am grateful for my 327 pound starting weight because I had a head start on her.

We are doing this.
We are changing our present and our future.
We can't change the past, but we can learn from it.
We will and we can be better, do better, and live better.
mmmhmmm...Yes We Can (sorry, I felt like Obama half way into my speech and had to throw that it in).

I am writing this for all of us! Sometimes the girl in the mirror with the pointed toe needs a reminder too! Love ya blog buds!

To read this in full Amy W. form click here

New Clothes & WL!!

I am going to make this a quick one because I have a doctor's appointment to go to and then a office birthday party to come back and plan for.

I have to first say a HUGE thank you to Joey for the Sisterhood donation. I recieved in my mail box the cutest two tops I've ever seen. I tried them on for my fam and they said "ooooh aaaahhh!" They loved them and said I looked so cute in them. I am just so thankful for a support system such as this. My mom, I think was shocked because she has never seen anything like this before. I tried to explain it to her, but in my excitement don't think I did it justice. Thank you again Joey!!! I♥U!!

Next on the band front. I have lost another 2lbs. So that puts me at 255lbs. I can't even remember when I weighed 255 pounds. This time last year I was on chemo and at 275lbs. I had did a crash diet and lost about 8lbs and trying to make a decision to be healthy. I was bald from the treatments and making sure I kept a positive attitude. Well today is a new day. I can see the weight loss and it is amazing me. I look at the pic above and I don't remember my face being that thin. Wow. The first pic was taken in July a week or two before band surgery. I think I was at 275 then. I was till trying to get those 8lbs. off I had gained. The second picture is me today (forgive my hair, waiting on my hair products in the mail) at 255lbs.

Happy Monday all!!!

Bruno Mars

Love this song and he is so cute!! Enjoy!!

This is such a happy song that I could cruise too.


Hey all!! I'm in a good mood this morning. I'm tired as heck. I posted a comment on another blog that said I now understand the fatigue that comes along with the band and not eating much. Whew, but I'm ok. I'm going to still do Zumba this evening. They say exercise gives you energy right. I have no clue how I'm doing with the Chica challenge in comparison to others, but I have been exercising. I calculate a total of 20.9 miles and a total of 8 hours of exerise. I included the Zumba time, but I don't know how many miles or distance that calculates into. Anywho I know I'm behind the veterans, but I'm proud of myself because this is the most exercise I have done consistently in years. My clothes are looser and I can feel my collar bones even though I can't see them yet, LOL. My VP tells me everyday I'm melting right before her eyes. I just shake my head and laugh at her. I'm down 13lbs. since surgery and if I add my pre-surgery loss that's a total of 21lbs. I'm proud of myself even though I want to rush things.

I found this audio of Willow Smith's new song "I Whip My Hair". I love the Smith family. I read where someone said that Will and Jada are pimping out their children and not letting them live regular lives, but I know that as a child I had high aspirations. What are their parents to do, tell them nope you can't act, or sing or model. You have to play, jump and run with the other kids your age and that's it. I think if a child aspires to do things that are positive, then we as parents should support that. Anyway, I'm getting off my soap box now. Check out the song below.

Fair Food & a little of I Wish Wednesday!

I found this in my newspaper today. I read another person's blog and they wrote about there not being any good food choices at the fair. This person choose the Barbeque Turkey leg because it was grilled. She only took about 3 bites before she was full. It's just a little blurb, but it shows how many calories fair food can contain. Dang it cause I love corn dogs.

Stick with the cotton candy when you head out to the fair. A billowy cone weighs in at 171 calories and 0 fat grams - but remember, it's completely sugar. If you're bringing out the stretch pants, though, here's some food for thought: Fried Snickers, 444 calories and 29 grams of fat; giant turkey leg, 1136 calories and 45 grams of fat; and funnel cake, 760 calories and 44 grams of fat.

Here are some more I found:

Fried Twinkie (2 oz.): 420 calories/34 g fat
Funnel cake (1): 760 calories/44 g fat
Twinkie Dog Sundae: 500 calories/14 g fat
Fried cheesecake (6 oz.): 655 calories/47 g fat
Foot-long hot dog and bun: 470 calories/26 g fat

The folk eating Fried Butter are just waiting to fall over dead.

You can find the whole article here: Fair Food Calories

And look at this heart attack waiting to happen:

Here is a little of "I Wish Wednesday"

•I wish I didn't worry about stretching my pouch so much. My best friend who had the band went for her fill back in June and told the doctor that she think she might have stretched her band and he said "you probably did" and had an I could care less attitude. Now I know my friend wasn't doing what she was supposed to and I am for 99% of the time so I don't know why I worry about it so much.

•I wish the apartment my sister applied for would call her already. I'm so ready to get my house back and clean, Clean, CLEAN!!

•I wish that I was doing something that I love all the time. Like Joey and Draz! One day, I will. One day I tell ya!!


First off I have to use the word that Jenn coined "haphausted". I can say thats where I am right now. I went to Nashville for my son's first game and had ball. I'm tired as heck, but am so happy.

Here is a pic of my SUN during the game. I didn't get a chance to get a full frontal one cause those guys were on the go. We have the Southern Heritage Classic this weekend where he will be home with the band. I'm so excited. I'm sitting right by the band.

I posted earlier about my eating, but we also went sight seeing. We saw the oddest dogs and they were .....lets just say special. Wow!

These dogs were just sitting there on a motorcycle. Very trained dogs. I had to question though how in the whole wide world they got their fur like that. No normal dog would have sat still for that. You had to see it.

Hope you guys are having a great week so far. I got Zumba tonight.

Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy!!

Anyone remember Ren & Stimpy. They were the most silliest cartoon out at the time. I hated to watch them, but it's like I couldn't turn away.

Grace of Grace's Fat Chance and Nella the Skinny B---H! were so wonderful in presenting me with such marvelous award. Thank you Grace & Nella for being such sweethearts.

So here are 10 things I like:

1. I love to hear the birds chirping on a cool crisp summer morning (before it gets 99 degrees). It takes me back to my childhood where my bed was under a window and every morning I would be awaken by a bird singing happily.

2. I love to sleep in and get up when my body says "wake up sunshine."

3. calms my soul (especially Jazz - listening to Miles Davis now). When anything stressful is going on, I can just pop in a CD and play something and my body just automatically transport.

4. My family. No matter if we get angry we are still there for one another. Everybody can't say they like their families. You have to love them, but like is another story. I truly do like them.

5. Technology. I have this thing where I have to get a new phone every year. I'm trying to cut that out, but in a few weeks I am getting an iPhone. I was going to wait until I get my longevity check, but the buttons on the phone I have are acting fickle so it's time. I also love computers.

6. The Food Network. On weekends I can sit and watch hours of that channel.

7. Which brings me to my favorite cook on there. I like Rachel Ray. I would love to meet her. Anybody got the hook up?

8. Fingernail polish. I have this collection of colors that I have been building forever. My sisters and nieces always come over to borrow. They always laugh because they feel like normal people have about 5 bottles of nail polish in different colors. Well I have about 55 or more.

9. Jewerly. I love little bracelets and earrings you can get from the beauty supply store. They don't cost much and I have built a little collection of that too.

10. Paper of any kind. I really like those cute journals. Kohl's has a cute one that I want to pick up. I think I have more journals and writing books than anything in my house.

Here are 10 Bloggers that I love and there are more, but I guess I will follow the rules....this time ;-).

1. Stephanie
2. Bonnie
3. Ronke
4. Joey
5. Catherine
6. Nicole
7. Amanda
8. Angela
9. Michelle

There are so many others. In fact 75 or more of you lovely gals, but of course I would be all day typing. Just know that you all deserve this award.

To all my lovely new followers....thank you, Thank you, THANK YOU!! I appreciate you being along on this journey with me and I look forward to sharing in your's. If I have happened to over look you and am not following your blog somehow, please let me know in a comment.

On the WL front, I have lost another pound. I went to Nashville for my son's first game and had a ball. I tried to make good food choices, for the most part I think I did well. I didn't get stuck or anything like that although I was looking for it. Went to Applebee's and had a Grilled Chicken Pasta salad & a little Spinach & Artichoke dip Saturday night, Since I was traveling Saturday Morning I had homemade veggie chili for breakfast. I am not a breakfast person, so unless it's yogurt or a protein drink, I stick to non breakfast fare. I didn't get a chance to eat a lot so I had plenty of water and some cheese sticks to tide me over. On Sunday, I ate some of the pasta salad I had from the night before because you know I didn't finish it. For lunch that day we went to Shoney's and I got a salad and tried the chicken but it didn't feel good going down so I got some Meatloaf and it was nasty so I just stuck with some mashed potatoes and called it a day. The only problem I would say that I'm having when I go out is drinking while eating. when I'm at home or work its not a problem, but when I'm out with friends, I find myself wanting to drink because it's there. I guess I could just not order it and get a to go cup. Later that evening as we were dropping our children off we stopped at Jack in the Box and I got a Teriyaki Chicken bowl. It had in there broccoli, grilled chiken in teriyaki, shredded carrots and rice. It was actually good and I got full and couldn't eat it all. I always worry though about stretching my pouch.

Other stuff to tell, but I don't want to bore you guys and this post is already becoming to long.....HAPPY MONDAY!!!

Amy came up with this great idea. I think it's a great idea to one get to know each other better, but just over all feel good about ourselves or just vent. Whatever the topic may be for that week.

Today's subject:
Let's celebrate our own beauty and how wonderful we all look with a photo of your favorite feature.

Funny because for years I always thought that my smile was the most captivating thing I had on my body. I would smile big and bright showing all my teeth. One day I had to give a speech about our best trait and I said it was my winning smile. The teacher asked for responses after the speech to critique or whatever and this guy said that my smile was nice, but it was my eyes that drew him in. Needless to say I was shocked. I always thought I had these little slanted eyes that no one could tell were open when I smiled. Later in life, I told one of my BFFs the story and she agreed. Who knew...?

A HUGE Thank You!!!

I have never met a more caring group of people than the ones that are in this support system. I was really going through a rough time on Friday. Although my rough periods don't usually last long, Friday hit me kinda hard. I was a fit of tears most of the day. I won't begin to name names, but you for those of you who reached out or thought kindly or just said a word of prayer for me. I thank you. You are all so awesome. I'm better today and know what I need to do. Thank you again for all you do and are.

Love you much!!


Work out clothes

I forgot to mention that when I went to zumba, I had on some jogging pants I got from the Nike outlet (men's btw) and an old t-shirt (ink stains and all) that I had when my son was in middle school in a 4x. I looked horrible. Needless to say I need to get some work out clothes. I saw some ladies there that had on those cute capri pants to work out in. I will eventually go to Wal-mart to get some, but it will have to wait a couple of pay periods. If anyone wants to donate an old pair, I'm a size 22. Thanks ladies for listening to my long rant below.

Love you guys much ♥♥♥!!

Happy Friday!! Ramblings of a 4th grader...I mean 41 year old.

Happy Friday everyone!!!! The day is more than half over and the weekend is almost upon us. For some that may mean absolutely nothing if you have to work on the weekend, but hopfully you will get to enjoy it anyway. I will say that the weather here in Memphis has been STUPENDOUS!!! I mean 85 degree weather or less and at night 68 degrees. Now this is my time of the year....that is until it gets hot again. Cause y'all know Summer ain't over yet.

So I've been thinking again. I know, I know... bare with me cause I have to put stuff in bullets or else you won't be able to follow my craziness.

•I've lost 11 pounds so far. I went in to the surgery weighing 270# and I now weigh 259#. So why am I thinking I'm not doing enough to lose like other people. It's funny because I go on other blogs and see what people who were banded around the same time as I have lost and I even go on blogs and count up the number of #s they have lost in 2 weeks(where I am) or a month. For instance Michelle over at The Band in Me has lost 27#s in little over a month. Am I jealous, by all means no. I am happy and excited for her, but it makes me question am I doing enough to loose. Ok so I know that I should not be comparing my loss and efforts to others, but I don't want to fail. I guess I look at what others are doing and see a standard that I should be upholding to. I always think I'm slacking somehow. I'm goofy y'all forgive me.

•I did Zumba last night with a friend/fellow band parent. I was content with staying in the back because I'm uber goofy and am not coordinated in the least, but she insisted I come up front with her. I couldn't keep up, but I did the whole work out. At some points I got a little embarrassed because I wasn't doing the moves right most of the time. At one point one of the teachers (three were interchanging), got in front of me and was doing the exercises. I guess to coax me along. I got through it though and have vowed to do Zumba twice a week (every Tuesday & Thursday). My friend said that the teachers we had last night were not the usual teachers and basically didn't do like the one that always facilitates (did that make sense). Jenese the regular teacher has a routine that everybody pretty much knows and that even she (my friend) was thrown off a little. Although it made me feel a little better, I still would have been out of my element even with the regular teacher because I didn't know any of it. There was this little pixie of a girl that had the moves down pat and I was just watching her to keep up. She was on the other side of my friend. She saw me watching her and would smile every now and then. She smiled and waved when she left class. I felt a little embarrassed again.

•I want to join Boobs, but I haven't even read the website. I don't even know what the group is all about. I have saw many post on other blogs about Boobs and even know about the upcoming Chicago trip, but have never ventured over there to see what it was all about. At one point when I first heard mention of Boobs, I decided I wasn't going to investigate because I had no boobs. I know silly of me. With this cancer thing as positive as I can be at times, I can also think of the most asinine and stupidest thing to be hard on myself for. Even now I sit here and actually have the nerve to cry because when I was at Zumba I wondered what folk thought of me because I didn't have any. I didn't know what was going on in the head of that little pixie of a girl exercising. I didn't know if she was judging me and thought something else. Although if I was a lesbian it would not be a bad thing, but you never know what people think of you just by your outer appearance. I wanted to yell out "It's ok I'm a BC survivor." So what if they thought anything, it doesn't matter what they think. I usually don't care what people think, but lately here I have been seeing a lot of looks from folk. It's like they look at me and don't realize that I can see the focus of their eyes shift to my chest. Sometimes I shrug it off and other times I don't know how to feel.

•With all of this I feel like a kid. A 4th grader wondering if I will have friends when school starts. for some reason I've just been doubting myself lately. I'm missing my son and feel lost at times. Here I go with the crying again.

•I don't know if you remember the post I made about my Executive Director (ED) leaving?? Well a couple of my collegues think I would be wonderful in that position. It would mean more money, but also much more responsibility. Well she isn't even gone yet (1 more week) and she has posted her own job. Yeah I know. She is so full of herself, but my VP couldn't do it because she doesn't know how. Go figure. Anyway, I pulled up the post (btw, I haven't told my VP I want the job yet) and the things my ED says she does, I actually do. My co-worker says she doesn't do that stuff you do. I had to laugh because it is so true. Now I went down to talk to my old VP who is like one of my mentors and she told me "don't tell yourself no, let someone else tell me no." In other words I should apply for the position and if it is for me I will get it. She did tell me something that I hadn't thought of. My ED spends a lot of time flirting with the donors. Working directly with donors is the one thing I don't do. She does a lot of smoozing and flirting to get that money out of them. My old VP said she is like a hostess. She entertains and that I should be aware of that. I began thinking, what if I can't do that. What if these donors need someone who is flighty and sugary. You know the kind. They speak to you in the highest possible pitch voice that is known to man. So high only dogs can hear it sometimes, LOL. My co-worker who is like one of my main supporters here told me that with my personality I would win them over because I'm sincere, unlike my soon to be ex-ED.

Anyway, that was the ramblings of a not so 41 year old. Forgive me for today. I'm a little bit off.

Have a wonderful weekend.

CONSTIPATION!!! Seriously???

Ok, I'm sorry to make a post about constipation, but WTH!!!!! OMG!! I have never experienced anything like this before in my life. Three tries it took. I will have to start taking Ex-Lax or something cause today was ridiculous.

Ok,I'm through with that. Eating is going good. I did have a bout yesterday where I wanted some real food. Had some squash and a VERY small piece of baked chicken breast for dinner. It was really moist and I chewed the heck out of it. But then I started worrying if I hurt my stomach by eatting real food to fast. Any thoughts??

Hope everyone is having a great day.

Who Knew

I can run y'all!!! Oh my goodness. I was exercising this weekend and while I was walking I just broke out into a run. It wasn't for a long time or fast mind you, but it was a run nonetheless. I'm so proud of myself. I didn't exercise at all Friday (unless you count walking around Walmart for an hour exercise - if so I will add that, y'all let me know), but Saturday and Sunday I kicked it into high gear. Well as high as my gears could go that is. See all week I had been doing my walk and only doing a mile, well Saturday I stepped it up and decided that I needed to do more. So I did 2 miles. Yes, me!! I couldn't believe it. Sunday I did 3 miles and I ran a little each day!!! I'm so proud of myself.

On the band front. I am just now starting to get hungry. Right now I feel my stomach growling. I had a protein smoothie for breakfast this morning and it filled me up, but that was at 7:30. Now its about 15 till 10 and I'm more than slightly hungry. I'm not famished, by any means, but hungry nonetheless. I'm drinking water to see if that feeling will be curtailed some. I had my first bout with head hunger last night. I wasn't really hungry, but wanted to go and eat more Baked Ricotta. Oh my goodness how good it was. One of my main problems in the past was overeatting because the food was so good. See I can cook. I am no chef, but I can hold my own in the kitchen. Therefore, when I cook I put my foot in it and oh how delish it can be. I want to just eat it all up. So yesterday I used will power and restraint. When it got a little bad, I got some sugar free chocolate pudding and mixed some of my chocolate truffle protein in it and OH MY GOODNESS, it was like I was having a premier desert. It was SOOOOOOO GOOD!!!

Anyway thats it for today. I don't have much, but wanted to post something.
Happy Monday!!

A Stupid question or two

For the last two days I have been able to eat soft foods...i.e. mushies. Yesterday I ate a 1/2 cup of corn beef hash with a 1/4 cup of mash potatoes. I wondered if that was to much food and if I was in danger of stretching my pouch. The day before I had a 1/4 of refried beans topped with ff-cheddar cheese and egg beaters (eq. of 2 eggs) soft scrambled with ff-cheddar. I felt stuffed after the dinner, but I wondered if I am eating to much. Any suggestions, comments or advice??

Next stupid question is. Will water just slide down in the lower stomach from the stoma(pouch)? I ask because I was reading another blog where the bander slimmed or PB off of water. Now the problem might have been for her that she was to tight, but I guess I'm asking because I don't want to drink to much at one time and have my pouch to full only to slim or PB it.

Any suggestions, comments or advice is greatly welcomed to this newbie in the game.


Giveaway Alert!!

Hey guys!! Shelly over at The World According to Eggface is giving away

Go on over to her spot and she will give you instructions on how to enter and maybe win!

Can I just say for the record I SOOOOOOO want to try these syrups. I called my local Whole Foods and they don't sell this product :-( Ok so I have to order it. With money being tight AND the fact that I hate to wait when I order something online, I hope that I win!!

Happy Hump Day!!

Doing Good and a little Rant

Eating is going good. I have been maintaining 3 meals a day with the mushies. Today though I'm feeling a little hungry so I whipped out my little 2 oz. no sugar applesauce and let that fill me. Yesterday I detected this and grabbed a cup of water. It lasted me until I got home and I exercised (1.5 mile walk) then ate a protein filled dinner.

So here is my rant for today:
Yesterday my Exec. Director (ED) decides that she can't stuff 9 envelopes so she asks me to do it. No problem, the only reason I seem to be here is to answer phones and be at their beck and call anyway. Anywho, she tells me to put the binders in the envelope along with a letter, seal and that she needs to get them mailed today. I must tell you that it was 3:30 and the university post office closes at 4 AND we are on the north end of the campus. So all the times that I have done this never have the letters been personalized. This time they were, but she neglected to tell me that. So I don't check the letters and stuff them in the envelopes. Fast forward to 30 minutes ago when ED comes over to my suite and asks me if I put each letter with each lable. She said she got a call from one of the people she gave the package to (because she hand delivered some) that he got a letter address to another person. I told her that I didn't match the letters because she didn't mention that. That they have always been generic for the last 3 years. I apologized for the mishap and she told me to ask next time.

I started off shocked, then pissed, and then sad. Shocked because something like this happened and she actually wanted to blame me. Pissed because she is going to bad mouth me to my VP and anyone else who will listen and sad because I began to blame myself because usually I check EVERYTHING. Sometimes I can be very OCD. I called my co-worker upstairs and she told me that none of it was my fault and that I have to consider the source. MY ED always messes up and blames others or accepts credit for stuff others do and talks bad about everybody. The only good thing from this is that my ED gave her 2 weeks notice and is resigning and will be moving to Hawaii for another job. Hallelujah!! No one can stand her, but just puts up with her. I just had to get this out. Its a ramble rant of sort, but I had blog it.

GO CHICA GO!!!!!!!

I'm going to participate. I never really win anything so this will be just to keep my motivation up to exercise and continue to lose weight. Go on over to Draz's to get all the info or just read the abbreviated version below:

Keep a log - and the person with the most miles wins a prize!

In order to give everyone the chance to log in and check blogs and such I'd like this to start on Friday, August the 20th and end on Friday, September the 24th! That's 5 exact weeks - 35 short days!

Let Draz know if you want to sign up and I'll keep a list of competitors. I may ask for updates and post them randomly so all of you with competitive spirits can be motivated along the way so keep your logs current!

Be sure to let your followers know about the challenge since I'm sure all of your followers don't follow me so they won't know about it unless you tell them.

Repost the pic above.



So I'm a little bit happier than I should be about this, but I was so glad to be off liquids. I guess because I was doing it a week before surgery, I have had all the liquids I could take. I don't see how folk who had to do a liquid diet for pre-op lasted, but my hat is off to you.

Today I had a protein shake for breakfast and for lunch I had refried beans topped with fat free cheddar cheese. I noticed it before but had to mention it now....fat free cheddar is so not like regular cheddar. It doesn't melt the same or pull the same. I guess because of the missing "FAT," LOL! Takes some getting use to. Tonight I will be having soft scrambled eggs with ff cheddar cheese.

Alycejo over at My Rescue is Possible asked a question that had been on my mind. How do you know when you are full? I thought about this and she asked it before I did. My method since I am newly banded is just to eat the exact measure that my surgeon recommends and eat when I'm supposed to. I wrote out a plan that I could follow. To be honest I just finished lunch about 30 minutes ago and I feel some gurgling in my intestines. I don't know what to make of that. I am not ever hungry and can't even feel my stomach (I guess that's due to swelling) to know that I'm full when I eat something. So rather than over eat, I just measure eat and stop. I don't want to not eat because I'm not hungry and get malnurished so I will continue this way.

I have to share this good news though that has nothing to do with WL. My youngest sister who moved in with 2.5 kids (2 & she's pregnant again) called and told me that she has been moved up on the waiting list for an apartment. She is not working and trying to get her GED. Because of those reasons she can only get an apartment in which rent is based on income. I'm so happy I could do my Snoopy Happy dance!!! My house is not that big and her kids make a mess. Don't get me wrong, I love them so much, but LORD I will be happy to have my house back.

My Lap Band Surgery Experience

Hi all!! As promised here is a blow by blow account of my day of banding.

The day before I went to work as normal and had planned to stay all day. Well that didn’t turn out to be the case. At 1:30 p.m. I drank “as advised” my Magnesium Citrate. Well I was making such a horrible face as my Assoc. VP walked in with another director that I had to explain that I wasn’t frowning at them. I told them that what I had drank and the AVP said oh my you need to go home. He was so funny, he was scaring me with stories of my possibly pooping on myself. I was howling laughing and my VP said that I better run home. Well most folk know I don’t always do what I’m told. So I prayed that I didn’t poop myself and went to my bariatric doctor to weigh in. I’m sorry there was NO way I was going to drive 40 minutes all the way home just to drive back out 40 minutes to get weighed. Nope not gonna happen. So I took my chances. I felt my stomach gurgle a little, but I kept going. I walked in the office and signed in. They called me back in 2 minutes and I was down from 278 to 270. I was happy because my surgeon is a stickler for doing what you are told. He has a distinct rep for being an A..hole, but hey I can role with the punches. After getting weighed, I stood around talking to the office nutritionist about recipes and what it takes to be successful. All in all I got home about 3:30. That’s hour and a half after I left. The laxative didn’t start working on me until about 5 p.m. So I was good. I milled around the house and got my stuff together for the next day, got my last broth and apple juice in and called it a night with some Tylenol PM.

Fast forward to 4:30 in the morning…..ugh! I am SOOOOO not a morning person, but got up showered and walked around the house for 20 minutes. I guess I had some nervous energy. My mom was up and ready to take me to the hospital so we left about 10 till 5. I think she sensed my nervousness or was maybe trying to cover up her own by making small talk. Normally conversations between me and my mom are free flowing. We made it to out-patient check in at 5:30 on the dot. I signed in and walked to “same day surgery.” The minute I got to the desk one of the nurses showed me to my room and I commenced to getting on that really cute gown that opens in the back. Then I met the most wonderful angel, My nurse Marcele. She took my vitals and told me that they were ready for me. I was shocked because normally when I have a surgery the wait time is at least an hour. The reminded me that because I sometimes have problems with anesthesia (malignant hyperthermia) I needed to be the first to have my surgery done. Ok, not a problem. They anesthesiologist came in and introduced herself as she checked for a vein, while my surgeon came over and asked if I was ready and prepared to do what was right (while my anesthesiologist rolled her eyes, LOL). Now I must mention that my surgeon is not well liked, by his colleagues or some of patients, but I wasn’t there to be his friend. I told him that I was and my assumption of the band and its purpose and he left to check my OR. My anesthesiologist was by that time thumping my hand and saying that she was proud of me for taking such a bold move for my health. We talked a bit and she mentioned that of course I had a big part to play and we talked a little about what I needed to do. She talked about her food addiction, but tried to make sure she didn’t gain much. She also said she would not say anything since she couldn’t say anything nice about my doctor, but the she recanted that and said…..”well he is very good at what he does.” With that my doctor stuck his head in the door and made a face. He was a little frustrated that they didn’t have my OR ready yet. They had to re-stock because of my condition. About 5 minutes later it was ready and I was wheeled about 3 doors down the hall (my last look at the clock said it was 7:45). They stretched my arms out like I was on the cross and pinned them down on foam with some Velcro straps. I mentioned how cold it was in there and the next thing I know I was out like a light.
I wake up in recovery to a nice nurse monitoring my blood pressure and temp as they both have a habit of spiking when I go in surgery. They both finally came down enough for them to let me go to back to my room about 10 am. I called my mom and told her I was out and she headed in (she had went back to take the grand kids to day care). My nurse Marcele, comes in and takes my vitals and they look good. She says that I have to stay until 3 p.m. I sleep off and on and awake to Marcele saying if I feel up to it I can take a walk. And walk I did. I circled the out patient floor 5 times. I was to loopy to count the steps, but determined not to have any problems with pinned up gas. Marcele said I was the poster child for success and that she had never seen any patient do that. I just kept going like the Energizer bunny. They finally released me right at 3 p.m. I rode out in my cute gown and robe. They said hey why change just go in that… I did. I got home and laid it down as the sleepies were coming back. My mom went and picked up my ‘script and I dozed in and out of consciousness. I finally got up about 5 and trotted to the bathroom. A little tired but not extremely so. About 7 I make myself sip some broth and take my meds (liquid Loritab). I’m not really in any pain. A little sore at the port site, but that’s it. I decide to walk my hallway about 10 times which is 20 steps one way, text my son and call it a night.
The next day I was feeling a little better, but still sore. I got up and sipped some broth, watched television and just decided to walk. So I got my little walking dvd out and did about 10 minutes of it. I did this off and on throughout the day, whenever the urge would hit me. I must also tell you that I have had absolutely NO problems with gas in my back or shoulders. I am sooooo happy about this as this was one of my biggest worries. I have just kept it moving. I walked in Wal-Mart, I walked in Sam’s club I even went to Nashville yesterday to see my baby boy!! One of my BFFs (the one that has been banded) called to check on me and asked if I was excited, I told her that I can’t say “I’m excited anymore because excitement wears off, I’m more determined than anything.” She didn’t have anything to say. AAAHhhhh well!! Got to keep it moving.

Ok, I didn’t mention my eating. I am sooo not hungry. Even today I am just eating because I know I’m supposed to. Today I have my protein shake for breakfast and lunch along with some sugar free jello. I have also been taking my Flintstones, and my sublingual B12s and I’m not tired either. I attribute the lack of fatigue to the fact that after you go through chemo, nothing makes you tired anymore. I got energy!! I am though, sick of broth. I have moved onto full liquids which are ok, but I’m soooo looking forward to the 5 & 6 week where I can go to normal food consistency. I have my first 2 weeks of meals planned out 2 being putting chicken breast in my crock pot with some veggies and going ham (as my son says). Seriously, I’m looking forward to cooking for the week and putting things up in my new Tupperware for each day. The next week will be poached salmon with Idaho potatoes in the crock pot. Well Tuesday I start my mushies and I’m excited about my refried beans and cheddar cheese among other things.

With that I will end here and let you know that the new name of my blog is “The Life of the Band” starring me and my band ….Jiminy Cricket or JC as he is so affectionetly called (thanks Gwen). He has deemed himself my official conscience as you can tell from the picture so I'm gonna let him run with it.


I have this HUGE smile on my face right now!!! I am so happy and feeling great. I saw the comments on my last post and I just LOVE each and every one of you!!! There honestly are no words. I wish I could give you all a hug! Your kind words, thoughts and much needed prayers got me through. I thought about you all the whole time I was there. I will do a seperate (hopefully not long) blog about it later as I have stuff piled on my desk.

I will say also that I not only love you guys for the kind words and prayers, but for your ability to give back. All your advice helped me throughout this process. Without you I don't know where I would have been. So with that said I am doing WONDERFUL and have already lost...drumroll please...................

10 lbs!!!!!

I♥♥♥♥you guys so much. Be back with another post later!!

Stephanie, thank you again for being such a sweetheart and posting an update for me. you are a Godsend!!